A tweet from TheKnaphillian reads “Into grass roots football? Then support your Real local football team(s). How about Knaphill F.C.” We’ll forgive the missing question mark on the end and we’ll also assume the word “Real” is not in capital letters because they are referring to Madrid, Sociedad, Betis, Zaragoza etc. Or, indeed, the lesser known Real Brunswick, whose last reported game in 2008 was a defeat to Brighton Electricity. Or, of course, Real Hydraquip of the Mid-Sussex League.

No, we think TheKnaphillian means real grassroots football, so the invitation to visit their website was too much for FootballCynic to resist. Indeed, when you arrive there, it is highly interesting. The Knappers as Knaphill are known can offer you Club Cashback – a scheme whereby the Club gains if you spend online. Just spend a few million pounds and Knaphill could play Tevez for 10 minutes one week. You soon find that the Youth team game is off as well as a friendly on Tuesday and, guess what, last week there was game of two halves. When you click through you disappointingly find that Knaphill Ladies only lost 3-1 to Tottenham Hotspur Ladies Reserves, though, to be fair, this doesn’t sound like a bad result.

But, what about the first team? Well, they could do better – 13th out of 18 in the Combined Counties Division 1 means that it is a long way to go before they make Football League status, but that’s hardly grassroots, is it? With no game, it would appear, this Saturday, Knaphill then face mid-table clashes with Worcester Park at home and then away games at Warlingham and Cobham in February. Having played runaway leaders, Guernsey, twice already, Knaphill should move up the table.

So, let’s hope this bit of publicity brings more than 51 to the terraces of Knaphill for their next game. If Alfonso XIII was alive today, FootballCynic is sure that he would become a patron of Knaphill so that they could be renamed Real Knaphill, the team for Real grassroots football. Below: The ticket office is closed; the game has started.