Solid as a Northern Rock
The Chancellor of the Exchequer failed to mention whether income tax might be raised so that Government-backed Northern Rock could put more money into Newcastle United in his Budget speech. However, the man described as "The Messiah returning to Tyneside" seemed delighted by his first point at Birmingham City. Employment minister, Andrew Smith, was unavailable for comment to answer the question of whether Mr Keegan may soon be becoming an unemployment statistic.


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